Ms Batville at the movies: Quick and dirty film reviews for the month of July

I've seen quite a few films over the last month and a bit (the pleasures of being child free and dating) and I've meant to write a review all of them. Time has skipped away so using a rating out of 5 stars, here is a simple and efficient Ms Batville summary of my recent viewing pleasures:


Children of the Silk Road
David Wenham almost steals the show in a five minute role at the start of the film where he plays the hard bitten cynic Australian journalist. Great scenery, cute kids, bloody awful dialogue, predictable plot. Jonathan Rhys Meyers sounds like he escaped from a cheap remake of Brideshead Revisted. Spent much of the last half the film thinking about whether I could get my hair to look like Michelle Yeoh's. Regrettably I decided I could not.
***

The Dark Knight
Chris Nolan can do no wrong by me. One of the best casts of recent times, cool stuff that blows up to excite the male gender, Maggie Gyllenhaal rocks and there minimum use of "lame dialogue but we can use this in the trailer" moments. (80's less famous sibling spot - Eric Roberts, brother of Julia.)
***1/2

Hancock
OK so Will Smith's character is an allegory for the US. I got that. I didn't get how the scriptwriters lost their way half way through and tacked on a mismatched love story that didn't fit with the first half. At all. (80's less famous sibling spot - Jason Batemen, brother of Justine.)
**

Indiana Jones and The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull
I love love love Cate Blanchett but she should have known better. I will never never never forgive Spielberg for wasting Karen Allen like that so she could spend the film gazing lovingly up at Harrison Ford's face lift scars whimpering "Oh Indy".
*1/2

Iron Man
Robert Downey Jnr, how I love thee. Is there a more talented "kick the others out of the park with his raw charisma" actor around today? No there is not. "I am Iron Man." Could have been silly but I loved it!
****

Lars and the Real Girl
This is still showing in cinemas, and that in itself leaves me with a feeling of fatigue much like the film. OK, but I'm over films about the quirky inhabitants of small American towns. It was old 15 minutes after Fargo.
**

Mongol
Gladiator in a yurt. Genghis did it all for a girl, only killed when neccessary and wasn't that bad a bloke. Really.
**

The Orphanage
Mildly scary at parts, a tad predictable but starring one of those authenic Spanish actresses who can look sexy while looking her age. An extra star for that
***

It is not exactly David Stratton but you get the gist.