Monday, September 25, 2006

Why did I get out of bed?

I have my doubts that anyone will read this but if you are - be prepared for whiny whinge (that is Australian for a complaining diatribe).

Another long day at work and nothing much achieved. It is not as though I don't have work to do. Some of it is even interesting - I just can't get motivated.

I am great at the meetings and the gabbing. For some reason I just can't bring myself to start putting it down on paper as I am required to do. Some years ago I put this down to a fear that my writing was not that great, but I know now that my writing is fine (comparatively), my reasoning is fine and the end product (when I get around to it) is damn good.

But instead of starting the work I have to do, I found myself having coffees, checking out the net, wandering around and applying for a new credit card online. The really stupid thing about all of this is that for the first time since I started work I am facing the prospect that if I can't do a better job and up my game I may have to get another job. I am so damn specialised I have no idea what else I could do or what else to do.

So, chances are I will have another sleepless night, leaving to a dreary day where I am too tired to concentrate properly so yet another deadline will slip by and I will be in even more strife. I really need to snap out of this and get motivated. The question for me is how?